Parental  alienating behaviours include, but are not limited to, preventing the  child from seeing their other parent; denigrating the other parent in  front of the child and/or directly to the child; and making false  allegations of abuse against the other parent. It is estimated that  false allegations of abuse account for 79% of cases during family court  proceedings. False allegations of abuse are acts of aggression with aim  of permanently severing the parent-child relationship.

Parental  alienating behaviours are family violence and a serious form of child  abuse. Alienating parents use emotional manipulation, verbal abuse,  physical violence and finan­cial abuse to maintain control over their  children and the other parent. Alienating parents use coercive control  to create a false world of confusion, fear and contradiction for the  child and other parent. Over time, coercively controlling behaviour  erodes the child’s and other parent’s sense of self and confidence. 

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Children  and parents who are subjected to these abusive behaviours experience  the same trauma reactions as those who have suffered other forms of  abuse. Some of the psychological issues for both child and adults are  symptoms consistent with complex post-traumatic stress reactions,  substance use problems, self-harm behaviours, eating disorders,  depression, anxiety, and suicidality. 

We  are now starting to understand the devastating effect that being  exposed to parental alienation can have on vulnerable young children as  they grow into adulthood. Adults alienated as children are more likely  to fall into similar abusive relationships and be alienated from their  own children. They are at greater risk for diagnosed mental health  disorders such as post-traumatic stress, anxiety, depression, substance  use, and are more likely to contemplate suicide compared to adults who  have not experienced parental alienation. The stories are undeniably  devastating for these alienated adult children, and they have a similar  theme: Why  didn’t anyone help me as a child? What will it take for society to  realise how damaging parental alienation is? Why is this happening to me  again?

The process of  unravelling the damage is delicate and slow, with many alienated adult  children experiencing grief about the childhood they lost and confusion  or anger about the fact that it was taken away by the alienating parent  so easily in some cases. 

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The  other (alienated) parent can also suffer multiple issues in addition to  psychological distress. They are often left feeling confused,  traumatised, suffer self-doubt, fear, and loneliness. Many struggle on  their own because their experience is often ignored, denied and/or  unacknowledged. Alienating behaviours are designed to isolate the  alienated parent from others, which often leaves them suffering alone.  Alienated parents experience significant financial losses from ongoing  litigation with the alienating parent in attempts to maintain a  relationship with their children and defend themselves against false  allegations of abuse. The rate of suicide in alienated parents is high  with 23% of alienated parents having attempted suicide at least once.  

Click here to learn more about the impact of alienating behaviours on parents

False  allegations of abuse are serious parental alienating behaviours. They  leave the child believing they have been hurt by a parent when this is  not the case. They feel overwhelmed, alone and scared, believing that  their other parent is dangerous and unsafe.  False allegations isolate  the children from family members of the alienated parent.  False  allegations of abuse damage the child’s and parent’s sense of safety.   It also isolates alienated parents from family, friends and the  community who are mistakenly led to believe they are a dangerous parent.   These divisions can last a lifetime.

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The  damage caused by parental alienating behaviours and the suffering  caused by it is aggravated by the fact that this form of abuse is  hidden, ignored, and disbelieved by many. It is not spoken about and is  stigmatised. Those affected by it suffer in silence. Any child, parent,  stepparent, grandparent, or extended family member can be impacted.

This  serious form of abuse and family violence can no longer be ignored.   Parental alienation behaviours must be acknowledged in Australia as it  is in other parts of the world. We need legislation which not only  acknowledges its existence but firmly and clearly legislates against  it. 

We urge you to consider the  impact this may have on those you love, perhaps not today but into the  future. Potentially, this might be you or your child, a member of your  family or their child, a friend and their child, your close community,  or a member of the broader community who have children.

Your  signature on this petition is a signature for the future of all  children who may become a victim in a parental separation or divorce. We  are calling for a legislative change.

Parental Alienation Awareness Day is the 12th October